Love Child
by ManateeMama
Summary: As Brenda works her case she and Fritz have to confront their own childless state.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Before you read this, be sure that you have read Labyrinth01's latest chapter of Welcome Her Home With Red Roses.**

Brenda groaned. She was bone-weary and every cell in her body was demanding to shut down. But she still needed to finish reviewing a box of evidence before sending it over to the DA's office. She hadn't seen her husband in three days and wanted nothing more than to finish up and get home. She picked up her ringing phone anyway and heard Chief Pope's voice talking to Taylor. "Yes, Will," she said impatiently, grabbing his attention.

"Brenda, the wife of an attorney who is the Chief Counsel for the Diamante Movie Studios was just found murdered in her home. I need you and your squad to get over there immediately."

"You do know that we've been workin nonstop for almost three days," Brenda protested.

"I'm sorry but it can't be helped. Get over there now," was the reply.

"But..."

"I'm sorry Brenda, but you have to get over there now."

"All right," she sighed, "Let me have the address." She wrote it down and walked into the Murder Room.

"Listen up, everyone. Chief Pope has just assigned us a new case so we're rollin out."

Everyone groaned and Sanchez spoke up, "But, Chief. We've worked around the clock for more than two days now. Can't Robbery Homicide take this one?"

"Apparently not, Detective Sanchez. Chief Pope assigned it to us. So let's get movin." And everyone groaned again, put on their jackets, and followed her out of the Murder Room while Flynn observed that Pope was a miserable, heartless bastard. No one disagreed with him.

The crime scene was a mansion in the Hollywood Hills and Hollywood Division had already taped it off and SID was studying the minutiae of the crime scene. Kendall was kneeling beside the body of Marlene VanBuren when Major Crimes put on their booties and gloves and entered the mansion.

"Hello, Kendall. Do we have a cause of death yet?" Brenda asked as her squad fanned out and searched the rest of the house.

"She was shot in the face at close range so that was probably it. I don't see any other wounds," he replied.

"Time of death?"

"Her liver temp indicates she's been dead less than two hours."

"I want a rape kit and a complete tox screen," Brenda told Kendall and then turned to Sgt. Gabriel. "Are there any witnesses?"

"The housekeeper thought she was the only other person here. She doesn't speak much English so Sanchez is interviewing her now."

"All right. Where is she?"

"In the kitchen, down that hallway."

"Thank you, Sargent. Would you please gather up all the computers and cell phones?"

"Sure, Chief," he replied as Brenda turned toward the kitchen.

Sanchez heard her coming and said, "Chief, this is Mrs. DeSantiago. She said that she was cleaning in the laundry room. She heard arguing but thought it was the TV. When she heard a shot she ran into the living room and found Mrs. VanBuren. She said she heard squealing tires but didn't see anyone."

"Do we know yet who lives in the house?"

Sanchez nodded and referred to his notepad. "Marlene and Nolan VanBuren and their nine year old daughter Katrina. Mrs. DeSantiago and her niece, Alise Parado, live in the servants quarters out back. Alise is the daughter's nanny."

"Was Mrs. VanBuren employed outside the home?" Brenda asked.

Det. Sanchez spoke to Mrs. DeSantiago in Spanish and then turned back to Brenda. "No, Chief."

"Ask her if she knows of any arguments or problems either of the VanBurens were havin with anyone else. Work, neighbors, family."

Again Det. Sanchez questioned Mrs. DeSantiago and reported, "No. She's never seen any signs of trouble. She said they didn't seem like a close couple but they were polite and respectful of each other and of their daughter."

"Where is the nanny?"

"Today is her day off. She dropped the daughter off at school this morning and then was going to join friends to go shopping. She won't be back until dinner time."

They heard loud male voices coming from outside so Brenda said, "Thank you, Detective Sanchez. Be sure to get her formal statement," and she left in search of the voices. A man was standing in the driveway and had tried to push past Lt. Flynn. He was being restrained by two officers.

"Sir, Sir! You can't go anywhere right now. I need you to calm down and wait here. You can't leave yet, Mr. VanBuren." Brenda approached the men just as a gurney wheeled Mrs. VanBuren out of the house.

Mr. VanBuren watched them load her into the back of the coroner's van and his body sagged.

"Mr. VanBuren, I'm Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson. I'm very sorry for your loss but I need to ask you some questions. Gentlemen, would you please assist Mr. VanBuren to those lawn chairs back there so we can talk? Thank you."

Mr. VanBuren nodded and said, "All right, but we have to hurry. I have to pick up my daughter at school." Then he walked unassisted back to the lawn chairs and sat down.

Brenda said, "All right, sir. Is there anyone you know of who might want to hurt your wife?"

"I don't know of anyone. But she led her own life. I don't know most of her friends."

Brenda thought that was odd and asked him to explain.

"My wife and I were... estranged. We pretty much just shared the house for the sake of our daughter," he said. "She had her life and I had mine."

"I see. Did you and your wife fight?"

"No. Once we decided on our relationship we actually got along better than most couples I know."

"And can you account for your whereabouts today?"

"Yes, I've been in studio meetings all day. I just came home to change my clothes and then pick up Katrina at school and take her to her piano lesson. You can check it out."

"Yes, sir. Thank you, we will."

"Chief Johnson, I will answer any questions you have but I have to pick up my child at school first." Mr. VanBuren was adamant.

"No, you can't leave yet, sir. I'm gonna have one of my detectives call the school and ask that Katrina be held there for awhile. They can tell her that you're in a meetin so she won't be upset."

He nodded and gave the name of the school to Lt. Provenza.

When Lt. Provenza turned to leave, Brenda got up and spoke softly to him, "While you're at it see if you can confirm Mr. VanBuren's alibi. Thank you."

Mr. VanBuren overheard her and said, "If it will help I can give you a list of people who were in the meetings."

Provenza turned back to Mr. VanBuren and wrote down the names before leaving to call the school. A few minutes later he returned and stood just out of earshot. Brenda walked over to him. "Yes, Lieutenant?"

"Chief, his story checked out. He was at the studio in a series of meetings with executives and directors all day long. And the school can only hold Katrina for an hour."

"Thank you, Lieutenant. The housekeeper reported tires squealin after hearin the shot. Would you check and see if there are any tread marks in the street or driveway?" Brenda replied and walked back to where Mr. VanBuren was seated.

"Mr. VanBuren, my lieutenant tells me that the school can only hold your daughter for an hour so I have to make a decision. I can send a squad car to pick her up or you can get her, provided you agree to bring her to my office tomorrow. I'll need to interview both of you."

"No, a strange police officer picking her up would scare her. I'll get her. And I'll be down to your office in the morning."

"Thank you, Mr. VanBuren." Brenda walked back to her squad.

"Chief, there doesn't appear to be anything out of the ordinary in the house," Lt. Tao said, "But we won't know for sure until SID finishes.

Brenda nodded and said, "SID has the scene so I'm goin back to the office. Why don't you all go home and get a good night's sleep? We'll pick up tomorrow mornin."

"Are you sure, Chief?" Sgt. Gabriel asked. This was unusual, to say the least.

"Yes. We're all exhausted and bleary-eyed. I'm too tired to think straight. So, yes. Let's get a good night's sleep and we'll all perform better tomorrow."

When she got back to the office, Will met her in the Murder Room. "Where is everyone?" he asked.

"I sent them home for the night."

"You did what? Why?"

"We're not machines, Will," Brenda snapped at him. "We've worked around the clock for three days now. We're too tired to think. And if we don't get some sleep we're gonna make stupid mistakes. Do you want that?"

Will was fuming but he couldn't deny her logic.

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna call Fritz and then I'm goin home. We'll all be back workin tomorrow mornin." And, without waiting for an answer, Brenda turned and walked into her office, picked up the phone and dialed Fritz. When she heard his voice she said, "Hi, honey."

"Hi, yourself. But I don't recognize the voice. Do I know you?"

Brenda chuckled, "That's why I'm callin. Is there any chance you could come pick me up and drive me home? I'm too tired to drive."

"Sure. But I have to finish something here first. I'll meet you in the parking garage in an hour."

"Ok, thanks," she replied and sank back into her chair. She kicked off her shoes, put her feet up on the desk, and closed her eyes. The next thing she knew her phone was ringing. It was Fritz saying he was waiting for her.

"Oh, honey, I'm sorry. I dozed off. I'll be right down." She hung up the phone, put her shoes back on, grabbed her purse and left.

When she opened the door to the parking garage she saw Fritz standing there waiting for her. "Thank you, Fritzi. I'm so tired I don't know if I could keep my eyes open long enough to drive home."

"How about we go through a drive-thru and get something quick. Then you can just crash when we get home?"

"That sounds good. How about Buster's?" Buster's was Fritz's favorite burger joint so he was fine with that suggestion.

Brenda munched her fries as Fritz drove. When they stopped at a light, Fritz's attention was drawn to a ball field. He was watching some Little Leaguers practicing. As tired as she was, Brenda couldn't help but notice his longing gaze lingering on the ball field. She knew how deeply he missed having a child of his own but she also knew deep down that she couldn't help him with those feelings. So she said nothing.

When they got home, Brenda was still so exhausted that she took a shower and went right to bed while Fritz turned on the TV, found a baseball game, and ate his burger. His thoughts, though, weren't on the game. They were on the kids he saw practicing with such intensity and the parents he saw sitting in the bleachers supporting their children.

* * *

The next morning, greatly refreshed, Brenda walked into the murder room and greeted her squad.

"Chief," Sgt. Gabriel said, "Dr. Morales called. He'll be ready for us by the time we can get there."

Lt. Tao reported, "SID found a tire print in the road that comes from a tire which was standard on every Chevy Malibu sold in southern California from 2008 through 2010."

"Well, that doesn't narrow down the field to a manageable level yet, Lieutenant Tao. When Mr. VanBuren and his daughter arrive please put Mr. VanBuren in an interview room. Oh, and dump the phones and computers we picked up yesterday. And, Detective Sanchez, would you please take Katrina to the break room and keep her there? Thank you."

Brenda and Gabriel knocked and entered Dr. Morales' autopsy room. Dr. Morales greeted them but continued working on Marlene VanBuren. "I have some information for you, Chief Johnson. The bullet was a 9 millimeter and that was most likely the cause of death but I won't be able to say definitively until her tox screen comes back."

"Were there signs of a struggle, doctor?" Brenda asked.

"No defensive wounds. And given the stippling pattern, I'd say she was shot at close range but not close enough for there to have been a struggle. Oh, a couple more things. There was no sign of rape but she was six weeks pregnant."

"Thank you, doctor."

When she arrived back in the murder room she saw that the rest of her squad had already assembled the murder board. Lt. Provenza turned and said, "Chief, Mr. VanBuren is in Interview Room 2 and Sanchez has the kid in the break room."

"Thank you, Lieutenant," and she continued to her office where she called Pope. "Will, since you want this investigation fast-tracked, I need authorization for expedited blood work on Marlene VanBuren."

"Do you have any leads?" he asked in response.

"No, not yet. We don't even have a definitive cause of death. That's why I need the blood work as quickly as possible."

"All right. I'll authorize that. But, please. We need a speedy resolution to this case. Taylor is already being besieged by the press."

"Thank you, Will. I'm about to interview the husband again now. Maybe he can help us," and she walked into the interview room.

"Good morning, Mr. VanBuren. Thank you for comin in this mornin to talk to us."

"This gentleman read me my rights. Am I a suspect?" Mr. VanBuren sounded alarmed.

"Your alibi has been confirmed, sir. We asked you here this mornin hopin you could help us find the person who murdered your wife," Brenda replied. "Sargent Gabriel advises everyone we talk to here of their rights. It's standard procedure."

"All right. But what about Katrina? What's happening to her?" He was even more agitated.

"She's in our break room with our child care specialist. Don't worry about her, sir. She's completely safe. But I will need to speak with her before you can leave."

"Without me present?"

"If you don't mind, sir. We find that children are more inclined to talk to us if they're not afraid that their parents would disapprove of what they tell us. But let's get our interview out of the way first, shall we?"

"Fine. How can I help you?"

"Let's start at the beginnin. How did you meet your wife?"

"We met in Boston over ten years ago. I had just finished Harvard Law School and I met her in a bar." Mr. VanBuren then told of having a "friends with benefits" relationship with Marlene. After about four months, she told him that she was pregnant. He described her as a sex addict and said that he knew that she had also been sleeping with other men and that she did not know the identity of the father of her unborn child.

She told him that she had already had two abortions and that she was planning a third. Because he could possibly be the father and because of his own feelings about abortion, he had begged her not to go through with it. He asked her to marry him even though they were not in love. He promised to give her a good home, and all the trappings an up-and-coming attorney's wife could expect. All he asked in return was that she be discrete and that she permit him to raise the baby.

"I knew she did not want the baby but I really thought that she would love her when she arrived. But I was wrong. She never cared about Katrina so I became a single parent," he said sadly. "I'm the one who stayed up all night with her when she was sick. I'm the one who goes to all her teacher conferences, to her piano recitals and soccer games. Marlene always kept her at arm's length. She led an unconventional life but she was a good person. She was never abusive, or anything like that. She just never cared about Katrina."

"You said when you married her that she was a sex addict. Did she ever get treatment for that addiction or was that still a problem?" Brenda asked.

"She never got treatment for it but it was never a problem. At least it wasn't a problem for her. One condition of our getting married was her promise that she would be discrete and not embarrass me. And she kept that promise."

"Mr. VanBuren, did you know that your wife was six weeks pregnant?"

Mr. VanBuren looked surprised. "No, I didn't. But I can tell you that the baby was not mine."

"How can you say that definitively, sir?"

"Because several years ago Marlene gave me two STDs. After the second one I moved her into another bedroom and we have not had anything resembling a normal marriage since."

"Well, your wife obviously has had at least one other sexual partner since. Do you have any idea who that might have been?"

"No. As I said, she always was careful. I can tell you, though, that she belonged to a sex club that meets somewhere in Hollywood and that it's called 'Liaisons'."

"Do you know anythin about this club, where it meets, any of the members?"

"No. I didn't want to know about it."

"Mr. VanBuren, why did you tolerate that situation?" Gabriel asked.

"Because when you meet Katrina it will be obvious that I am not her biological father. Even though I have it in writing that I would raise Katrina, I know that the law always sides with the biological parent. I was afraid that if we divorced she would take Katrina away from me. And I love that child more than anyone else on earth." Mr. VanBuren was tearing up for the first time that Brenda had seen.

"And have you had any other sexual partners durin your marriage? Anyone who might have been jealous of your wife?"

"No, no one. It was a terrible price to pay but my position with the studio and my being able to raise Katrina were at stake."

"All right, sir. One last question before I talk to Katrina. What does she know about her mother's death?"

"I told her that someone, a bad man, shot her mother and that she died and that the police are trying very hard to find that person. That's why we can't go home for a few days. She took the news very hard. She cried all night long. Even though Marlene never loved her, she loved her mother."

"All right, Mr. VanBuren. I'm gonna go talk to Katrina now. You can wait here. Sargent Gabriel will wait with you. Can we get you somethin to drink? Coffee or soda, perhaps?"

"Maybe some water, if you don't mind. Please, be careful with Katrina. She's only nine years old. And she's very upset and scared right now. I don't want her to be further traumatized."

"Yes, of course, Mr. VanBuren. I'll be very gentle with her," Brenda replied as she rose.

Back in the Murder Room, Brenda spoke to Lt. Provenza. "Mr. VanBuren said his wife was a member of a private sex club called Liaisons and that it meets somewhere in Hollywood. See what you can find out about it."

"I'll be glad to," Provenza said with more enthusiasm than Brenda normally saw him exhibit.

She then walked into the break room where she saw a pretty little girl of Asian-American descent. She and Det. Sanchez were playing tic tac toe. He looked up and said, "Katrina, this is Chief Johnson, the lady I was telling you about. Chief, this is Katrina and she's been killing me at tic tac toe."

Brenda laughed and said, "Hello, Katrina. You must be a very good player."

"Yes, I am. But I think Julio let me win. If he's a detective he must be smarter than that," Katrina said confidently.

Both Sanchez and Brenda laughed at that and Sanchez said, "She's really smart, Chief."

"So I see. You'll make a great detective someday," Brenda smiled and then got down to business. "Katrina, do you know why your father brought you down here this mornin?"

"A bad man murdered my mom yesterday and you think we did it," Katrina replied tearing up.

"No, honey, no. You were in school so you couldn't have done it and your dad was at work too. But we are tryin very hard to find the person who killed your mom so we want to ask you some questions. Would you help us?" Brenda asked gently as she handed Katrina a tissue.

"I guess," Katrina again replied sadly.

"Thank you. Do you know if your mom was unhappy about anythin? Was she fightin with anyone?"

"A man came to the house last week and she fought with him. But I don't know who he was."

"Do you remember what they said?"

"The man said he couldn't give her any money and my mom yelled at him for coming to the house. That was all."

"Was their fightin just arguin or did either of them do any hittin?"

"No, they didn't hit each other."

"Did you see him or hear the man's name?"

"Mom called him Billy. But I didn't see him. I was listening at the top of the stairs."

"Do you know what they were arguin about?"

"Just what I told you. That's all I heard."

"Did your parents have any other friends that came to the house?"

"No. Just my friends that come to play and for sleep-overs."

"Did your mom go out a lot?"

"I guess. Lots of times it was just Dad and me at home."

"Well, thank you, Katrina. You were a big help. Detective Sanchez is gonna take you to your dad now."

Brenda entered the Electronics Room where she watched Mr. VanBuren hug his daughter tightly before they left together.

**A/N: The broken record continues... Please don't forget to leave your review.**


	2. Chapter 2

Brenda walked into the Murder Room. "Chief, I spoke to the manager of Liaisons. He's a real hardass. Wouldn't give me any information at all," Provenza said.

"Thank you, Lieutenant. Give me your notes, please," and when he handed them to her she walked into her office. As she dialed Liaisons she shook off the sadness that she felt from her interviews of Mr. VanBuren and Katrina. The manager, Allen Dornan, adopted the same attitude with her as he had with Provenza.

Brenda had no patience for him and only disgust for his business. "Mr. Dornan, we are investigatin the murder of one of your members. The way I see it, you have a choice to make. You can either come down here with a printout of your entire membership or we can come to your... establishment... with a warrant and do a complete search of the premises, includin interviewin all the members. Which will it be, sir?"

There was a momentary silence at the other end of the line followed by a sigh and Dornan said, "All right, provided that you agree to keep that information confidential."

"If we find the person or persons we're lookin' for we will need to interview them so I can't promise total confidentiality. I will have a warrant ready for you when you arrive. Or, as I said, we'll be glad to bring it to you along with several patrol cars and a batterin ram, if necessary." Brenda's tone was hard.

"No, that won't be necessary. I'll be right there." Dornan was resigned.

"Thank you so much," Brenda said and then walked back into the Murder Room. "Lieutenant Provenza, please obtain a warrant to search the Liaisons premises and all business records, especially their membership rolls. Oh, and any weapons," she ordered. "And when Mr. Dornan arrives, get the printout from him and search for anyone named Billy, Bill, William, Willard. Anythin that could be translated to Billy. Lieutenant Flynn, you can help him. Thank you."

An hour later Mr. Dornan arrived. Flynn advised him of his rights and put him in an interview room. Provenza took the membership printout with him and started looking at it.

"Chief, this printout lists middle names by initials only," he said.

"Well, then we'll just have to include every male with the middle initials B or W."

"Jeez, Louise! That'll take forever," Provenza complained.

"It can't be helped, Lieutenant. When Lieutenant Tao is finished dumpin the phones and computers get him to crosscheck the phone numbers with the cell phones."

Brenda took the VanBurens' photos from the Murder Board then she and Gabriel walked into the interview room, excused Flynn, and greeted Dornan. "Good afternoon, Mr. Dornan. Thank you for bein so prompt. Have you been advised of your rights?"

"Yes, I have. Am I a suspect?"

"I don't know yet, sir. Did Lt. Flynn serve you with our warrant?"

"Yes, he did. This says you're looking for weapons in addition to our records. I thought we had an understanding that you won't come to the club."

"That warrant covers what we're lookin for now, Mr. Dornan. We're hopin not to have to come to Liaisons," Brenda replied as she showed him the VanBurens' photos. Do you know these people?"

He picked up the photos and looked at them. "Yes, that's Marlene VanBuren. I heard on the radio this morning that she was murdered so I suppose that's what this is all about. I don't know the man."

"All right then, sir. What can you tell me about her?"

"She was a member in good standing. Always paid her dues on time and in cash. Preferred heterosexual liaisons. That's about all I know."

"How frequently did she visit Liaisons?"

"Several times a week, I think."

"Did she utilize the services of anyone in particular at Liaisons?"

"There were several men, yes."

"Can you give me their names, sir?"

He hesitated at first. But when Brenda pointed to the warrant he listed the names of several men and Sgt. Gabriel wrote them down.

"I want to emphasize to you, Chief Johnson, that all this information is confidential. Many of these men are married and some of them are very well known. Our club depends on our privacy."

"As I told you on the phone, I can't promise complete confidentiality since this is a murder investigation. But we will not intrude unnecessarily, sir. Can you tell me if Mrs. VanBuren ever argued or fought with anyone at Liaisons?"

"No, never. That's one thing we do not tolerate. If there's any unpleasantness or jealousy, we ask the member to leave immediately."

"Did you ever have to ask Mrs. VanBuren or any man she was with to leave?"

"No, she always obeyed the rules."

"Thank you, Mr. Dornan, for your cooperation."

"Is that it, then? Am I free to go?"

"Yes, sir, you are. But we may need to speak with you and your security personnel at some point in the future."

"All right. Just, please, don't release anything about us to the press and please don't come to Liaisons."

"Believe me, I won't unless I absolutely have to," Brenda replied as she left the room.

* * *

That evening Fritz had brought The Happy Family, Brenda's favorite Chinese dish. And he had made sure they didn't forget the hot mustard. As they ate he said, "Jerry told me about a great house for sale about two blocks from where he lives. It's got three bedrooms, a nice yard, and it's priced to sell."

Brenda was surprised because he hadn't mentioned house hunting in quite awhile. "Is it within our price range?"

"Well, he doesn't know the asking price. But the owner is a friend of his and he says that he's being transferred so he's eager to sell. He thinks he'll be open to any reasonable offer."

"Do we need three bedrooms? We're doin fine with just two here," Brenda said.

"Well... We could make one bedroom into a nursery," Fritz said tentatively.

Brenda swallowed hard and put down her chopsticks. "Fritz, I know you want a child more than anythin. And I wish I could give you one. But I can't."

"You don't know that, Brenda. Your PCOS doesn't necessarily mean that we can't get pregnant. And lots of people our age have babies. Why don't we go to see Dr. Dioli and see what she has to say?"

"No, no. It's not the PCOS, or my age."

"What is it, then?"

"I'm workin a case of a murdered woman who had a 9 year old daughter. She didn't want to have the baby but was talked out of an abortion by her husband. He really wanted a baby." Brenda stopped for a minute because her emotions were about to get the best of her and she needed to speak clearly.

She regained control quickly and continued, "The thin is, he married her so he could have this child to raise. And he's been a wonderful father. He's done everythin for this little girl and he loves her with all his heart. But the mother never changed. She wasn't mean to the girl but she never wanted to be a mother and she didn't love the child."

"Honey..."

"Let me explain this, Fritz. Despite her daddy's love, this child knows her mother didn't love her. And nothin the father can do can make up for that. Fritz, that woman is me. I don't want to be a mother. And you're that father. I know you'd make the most wonderful father in the world and you would love a child with everythin you have and everythin you are. But even your wonderful love wouldn't be able to make up for the fact that I won't be able to be a good mother."

"Brenda, you don't know that. I know that you'd love our child as much as I would."

"That's what Mr. VanBuren thought. But he was wrong, Fritzi. Marlene had a lot of problems but she wasn't a bad person. She just wasn't cut out to be a mother. Neither am I." She saw Fritz's face fall and tears fill his eyes.

"I love you with all my heart and I want to make you happy. But I can't give you a child. Not because of me, but because of the child. I would be destroyin a child's life and I just can't do that." She saw Fritz's immense sadness and tears filled her eyes.

Fritz turned his head away and stared out the window. Finally he nodded and got up from the table. "I'm going to take a walk. I need some fresh air," he said quietly and walked out the back door.

Brenda stared at her plate. The Happy Family now tasted like ashes so she put everything away and washed the dishes. As she worked she fought tears and her emotions forced her to keep swallowing hard. She had never seen so much sadness in Fritz's eyes and those eyes were burning holes into her soul.

* * *

Fritz didn't know where he was going. He could barely see through the tears but he didn't try to wipe them away. His heart was in free fall. He had wanted children his entire adult life. Even though Brenda had told him before they married that she didn't want children he had not been able to quell his hopes for a family. No, it had taken Brenda to do that. But he couldn't be angry with her. He had seen the pain in her face as she explained how she felt and he knew she was right. Nothing he could do for a child could overcome the lack of a mother's love.

"How could this have happened to me? I have always wanted children. Why did I have to fall in love with the one woman who doesn't have a maternal bone in her body? But I did fall. No, fall is such a trite word. I plummeted head first in love with Brenda. I know that everyone dreams of that kind of love, but they don't know the pain that comes with it."

As he walked past the housing complex he was distracted by a mother yelling and a child crying. He wondered about that family. Had that mother wanted children? Had she gotten into something that she couldn't handle? Was she just stressed out at the moment? Did she have all the help she needed from the child's father or was she a single parent? He knew that not every family was a happy one. Was parenting as painful as building a great marriage?

But weren't children the whole point of marriage? Weren't all women supposed to want children? Wasn't raising children supposed to be every woman's dream job? He had always accepted that version of how lives were supposed to progress. And even though Brenda had made her feelings clear, he had been confident that she would come to want the same thing that every woman is supposed to want.

But she hadn't. So he had to face a childless life. "It would be so easy if I would have broken the engagement and found a normal woman," he thought bitterly. "But I could never have left Brenda. I love her too much." As he walked his eyes cleared. "I knew what I was doing." And he knew that he wouldn't give up the happy marriage they had finally achieved. They had gone through too much pain and frustration to give up on each other and the result of going through the fires had been a strong, loving marriage. And, as much as he wanted children, he knew he would never give up marriage to Brenda.

He stopped at a light and realized that he had walked almost three miles so he turned around and walked home. By the time he arrived it was after midnight. Brenda was sound asleep and Joel was sleeping on his side of the bed. He didn't want to disturb her so he picked up his pillow and walked quietly to the couch.

Brenda never heard him come in. The next morning she found him asleep on the sofa. She tiptoed up to him, stopped and listened. His slow and rhythmical breathing told her that he was still asleep. So very quietly she bent over him and sniffed. No telltale smell of alcohol. "Thank goodness," she sighed in relief and tiptoed out the back door.

* * *

When Brenda entered the Murder Room, Lt. Tao stood up and said, "Chief, I've finished dumping the phones and I'm cross-checking the numbers against the membership lists. I'm not finished yet but I've got several calls to and from a cell phone belonging to a William Hadley who is also a member of Liaisons. The last three calls received from that phone lasted only two or three seconds. I'm guessing they were hang-ups."

"Thank you, Lieutenant Tao. Please continue workin on those lists. Detective Sanchez, would you bring Mr. Hadley in to pay us a visit?"

When Sanchez brought Hadley in and had Mirandized him, Brenda went in to interview him. "Good mornin, Mr. Hadley. I'm Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson."

"Why am I here?" he demanded.

"I brought you in to talk about your relationship with Marlene VanBuren," Brenda explained.

"Who?"

"Oh, come now, Mr. Hadley. Surely you remember her," Brenda said as she showed him Mrs. VanBuren's picture.

Mr. Hadley looked at the picture and then at the wall and said, "No, I don't know her."

"Do you have memory problems, Mr. Hadley? Because you called Mrs. VanBuren several times the other day." She saw a flicker cross his eyes so Brenda knew she was on the right track. "And we know that you visited Marlene VanBuren at her home about a week ago. We have an eye witness who described an argument the two of you had."

When he heard that, his body stiffened and he clenched and unclenched his fists but he said nothing.

"Why didn't Mrs. VanBuren want you in her home?" Brenda saw that she was beginning to bore into his defenses.

"Umm. Well, I guess I did know her. We both belong to a club."

"Yes, I know you both were members of Liaisons."

When he heard that, his body slumped and he said, "She was someone I... met... at the club a few times."

"I see. Why don't you tell me in your own words about why you went to her home? And remember. I've got an eye witness so I'll know if you're not bein truthful."

"Marlene had told me she was pregnant and that I could be the father. She wanted money for an abortion because her husband is a bigwig in the movie industry and she didn't want the news to get out."

"And why was that, sir?"

"I guess she was afraid the bad publicity would be bad for his career. I went to her house to tell her that I didn't have any money because I didn't want my wife to find out. She doesn't know I go to Liaisons."

"Mr. Hadley, I'm sure by now you've heard that Marlene was murdered about a week after your little visit."

"I didn't kill her," he insisted. "I have an alibi."

"All right, what is it?" Brenda asked.

"My boss and I had driven down to San Diego to pick up some equipment and some parts to repair an arc welder. We were gone all day. Call my boss at Harkins Tool and Die. He'll confirm that."

"All right, Mr. Hadley, we'll check that out." And then Brenda changed tack. "Mr. Hadley, what kind of car do you drive?"

"A Tacoma pickup. Why?"

"Are there any other cars registered to anyone in your family?"

"My wife has a Chevy Malibu. Why are you interested in our cars?"

Brenda ignored his questions. "Tell me, Mr. Hadley, do you own a 9 millimeter handgun?"

He looked surprised. "Yes, I do. Just like millions of other citizens. It's my right and I have a permit."

"Well, Mr. Hadley we don't want to step on the Second Amendment, but we would like to test that gun so Detective Sanchez here is gonna drive you home and bring back that gun for testin. Is that all right with you?"

"Why not? As long as I get it back. That'll prove that I didn't kill Marlene."

"If it's not the murder weapon and your alibi checks out, then you're in the clear. But first I need to ask you who else knows that you have that gun?"

"My wife knows I have it. And my brother-in-law was with me when I bought it. I don't think anyone else knows about it."

"Thank you for helpin us out this mornin," Brenda said and they all left the room.

"Detective Flynn, would you please call Harkins Tool and Die and find out if Mr. Hadley really was on a trip to San Diego all day on the day of the murder?" Brenda asked. "Thank you."

Later that day, Tao's phone rang. "Thank you, Phil. That puts us closer." Then he turned to Brenda and said, "That was Phil in Ballistics. Mr. Hadley's gun was definitely the murder weapon."

"But Hadley's alibi checks out. He was definitely with his boss that day. They left around 9:30 and didn't get home until after 5:00. Hadley even signed the receipt for the parts so his boss wasn't covering for him," Flynn added.

"But someone used that gun. And Mr. Hadley said that only two people knew he had it. So let's start there. Lieutenants Provenza and Flynn would you please pick up the wife and the brother-in-law and bring them in? And, Lieutenant Tao, since we now have the murder weapon that earns us a search warrant of the Hadley home. Be sure to include all vehicles in our request. Thank you."

Later, Sanchez knocked on Brenda's office door and said, "Chief, Carol Hadley is in Interview Room 1 and Rick White, the brother-in-law, is in Interview Room 2."

"Thank you, Detective," and she got up, asked Provenza to follow her, and went into Interview Room 2. "Good afternoon, Mr. White. I'm Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson and I believe you've already met Lieutenant Provenza."

"More like evening. Why did you drag me away from my dinner in front of my wife and kids?"

"Well, I'm sorry about the timin but I need to talk to you about a gun."

"Gun? What gun? I've got several guns, all unloaded and properly locked away. I have kids too, you know."

"The gun I'm interested in isn't yours, Mr. White. It belongs to your brother-in-law. Have you ever seen it?"

"Yeah, a 9 mil. I was with him when he bought it. What about it?"

"This particular weapon was used to kill this woman." Brenda showed him the picture of Marlene VanBuren. "Does she look familiar to you?"

"Her picture has been in the news. But I've never met her."

"Do you know if your brother-in-law knows her?"

"No. At least he's never mentioned her."

"All right, sir. There were finger prints on the gun so we'd like to roll your prints to see if they're a match."

"Fine. I've got nothing to hide."

"One last thing. Can you tell me the make and model of all the cars in your family?"

"I drive a Dodge Ram pickup, my wife has a Toyota Camry, and my son has a Toyota Corolla."

"Thank you, sir. Lieutenant Provenza, would you please get Mr. White's prints and give them to Lieutenant Tao to process? Thank you."

Brenda then left and walked into Interview Room 1 where Sgt. Gabriel was sitting with Carol Hadley.

"Good evenin, Mrs. Hadley, I'm Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson. Thank you for comin in to talk to us today. Have you been advised of your rights?"

"Yes, but your officers didn't give me any information. What's this all about?"

"I want to talk to you about these people," and she put the VanBuren's photos on the table.

Carol Hadley looked at them briefly and said, "What about them?"

Brenda pushed Marlene's picture forward and said, "This is Marlene VanBuren and I'm investigatin her murder. I'm wonderin how well you knew her."

She looked surprised and responded, "Who says I knew her?"

"I know you knew her, Mrs. Hadley. Did you know her well?"

"No."

"How did you meet her?" Mrs. Hadley said nothing so Brenda continued, "Did your husband introduce her to you?"

"No." Brenda heard disgust in Carol Hadley's voice.

"Then let me ask why you went to her home three days ago." When she didn't reply, Brenda said, "We know you were there. You're not helpin yourself by not talkin to me, Mrs. Hadley."

She hesitated for a minute then replied, "I went to tell her to leave my husband alone."

"Was she botherin your husband?"

"They were having an affair. So I told her that she'd better leave Billy alone."

"What did she say?"

"She just laughed. She said that Billy was a grown man and that he could make his own decisions."

"What did you do then?" Again, Carol said nothing so Brenda switched tactics. "I know that if my husband was havin an affair I would be furious and I'm sure I'd tell the other woman to back off, too."

Carol nodded. "I did but she just laughed at me."

"Oh, no. How awful. Did you fight with her?"

"No, I left."

"I'll bet you were furious. But why did you go back?"

Carol looked surprised. "I was furious. I went back because I needed to make her leave Billy alone."

"So you argued with her again."

"Yes."

"And did she agree to back off when she saw how angry you were?"

"No," Carol started to cry. "She told me that what she and Billy did together was none of my business. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Billy is my husband."

"So you shot her." Brenda added.

"Yes, she told me their affair wasn't any of my business. It made me so mad that I shot her. You can understand that, can't you?"

"Yes, Mrs. Hadley, I certainly do understand that. But I also understand that you brought your husband's gun with you. And that's premeditated murder so you're under arrest. Sargent Gabriel, please take Mrs. Hadley to bookin."

When she walked back into her office she grabbed her cell phone to call Fritz but she saw that she had a voice mail message from him so she picked it up.

"Hi, honey. I'm going to be meeting with someone after work tonight so I'll probably be home late. You'd better pick up dinner for yourself. I'll grab something on my way home."

* * *

Brenda was finishing up her barbecued chicken takeout when Fritz walked through the door. "Hi, honey. I've got some extra chicken here. Would you like some?" She anxiously scanned his face for signs of his emotional state.

"No thanks. I already ate." He put his brief case down on the table and withdrew some brochures and papers from it and handed them to Brenda.

"What is all this?" she asked as she retrieved her reading glasses from her purse.

"I've been thinking about what you said last night and I know you can't change your mind. So I met with a man after work. He works with the Big Brother program here in LA. I'm thinking that maybe I'd like to become a Big Brother to a kid."

"Oh, Fritzi, that's a wonderful idea. You'd be a fantastic Big Brother."

"I signed the papers so they could do a background check but you have to sign them too."

"Of course I will. I'll do anythin I can to help. How long does it take?"

"Since we're both law enforcement it should only take a few days."

"Did you pick out a child?"

"No. They won't match me with anyone until I've been approved. But we talked about the kind of kid I think I could help. I think I'd like a boy around 8 or 9 and there are plenty of them available."

Brenda stopped reading the material and looked up into Fritz's face. With emotion cracking her voice she took his hand and said, "I know this isn't what you really want. But you'll be amazin for a child who needs a great role model. This makes me so happy." And she leaned forward and lovingly kissed her husband.

* * *

A month later, on Saturday morning, Fritz came through the door beaming and accompanied by a young boy. "Brenda, I'd like to introduce you to Emilio Hernandez. He's a crack pitcher for the Rockets."

Emilio entered and said, "Hello." Then he turned to Fritz and said, "You sure have a pretty wife."

Brenda laughed and said, "Well, thank you, Emilio. I am really happy to meet you."

THE END

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